« Allez Les Verts: Part Deux | Main | Asian Apples »
March 23, 2008
Points of Diminishing Return
As you know, I'm 47.
So, applying some simple math and using round figures, I've been of dating age for 30 years. Yes, I know, for roughly 1/3 of those years I was married, but The Wife at The Time and I would have dates, so, I'm sticking with the 30-year figure.
For this blog entry we will focus on those years I was dating and in my 20s for, with the exception of one 31-year old, I was dating women who were also in their 20s.
Not to boast but when I was in my 20s several of the women I dated were attractive to the point that I'm not sure what led me to think I was even in their league. I'm not kidding, I'm not bragging, it's just important to the post.
As often happens when dating a woman sometimes, you know, if you've been living right, you end up in bed. And I've got to say that just about anytime I was in bed with one of these women I never once suggested doing something that caused her to turn and run off. If I had an idea she was always game and more than once an idea was suggested that, while new to me, seemed rather interesting.
Only once did I say no to something. My thought being that had her father ever ever walked in on us, generally speaking, he would have killed me. Had he walked in on us doing that he would have killed me and made it hurt, assuming of course he could figure out what that was. The fact that it was her idea probably wouldn't have mattered to him as I doubt he'd have entered the room asking, "And who's idea was this anyway?"
To summarize to this point: In my 20s I dated some very pretty women, also in their 20s, who were not only on-board with any ideas I had regarding sex but often brought new and interesting ideas to the bedroom or living room floor with them.
Naturally, dating isn't all about sex. There are dinners, movies, concerts, and things of that nature that have to be paid for.
Originally there was a whole lot of math in the post at this point. Upon further consideration I decided math wasn't needed. All that you need to know is that never in my life did an evening with a woman ever come close to costing me $4000. Even if we both ordered an appetizer.
Sometimes an evening didn't cost anything at all. Sometimes she paid and we still ended up in bed or on the floor on a big sheet of plastic surrounded by cans of Reddi Whip.
All of this has been making wonder what it was Spitzer was getting for his money.
Not taking anything away from the gal he was snuggling up with, she's cute, but I have been with more attractive 22-year olds. And I was just a normal guy, not the Governor of one of our more populated states. That's got to be good for something; even for a guy in his 40s.
Why not a $500 hooker? I've got to believe that when you're talking about the world's oldest profession you hit the point of diminishing return pretty early as it applies to price.
I suppose your $25 hookers might be a little bit past their prime. Fifty dollar hookers, well I pay more than that for my bike shorts; of course, my bike shorts are probably tighter than even your $100 prostitutes.
For the sake of argument let's suppose that $25 nets your basic, stereotypical, crack whore. And $250 is good for a grad student at NYU who is doing a little hooking in her spare time. The extra $225 seems like a good investment.
I would argue that the difference between a $25 prostitute and a $250 prostitute is night and day. A world of difference. The return on this investment is measurable in the money that you'll not have to spend on antibiotics.
I'd further bet that the difference between a $250 and a $4000 hooker is negligible. It's like having two gigs of RAM in your computer and adding another two; it's good for bragging rights but for the typical user not much more.
Posted by delmer at March 23, 2008 10:28 PM
Comments
Sounds very reasonable to me! Apparently he should have gone with $250 prostitutes.
I'm surprised that bike shorts are $50 though. I'm glad I don't need special clothes to rollerblade.
Posted by: Jill/Twipply Skwood at March 23, 2008 11:31 PM
You have put alot of thought into this, I can tell.
That's my Governor, er, Ex-Governor you're talking about. Then again, I've heard alot of "Spitz(er) Swallow" jokes to last me a life time. Among them:
"It's just mind-blowing that he spent $4,300 on a hooker. It just shows how high the cost of living is in New York. That same hooker would cost $50 in Newark."
Posted by: FromTheMorePopulatedState at March 24, 2008 12:07 AM
>my bike shorts are probably tighter than even your $100 prostitutes. Dammit! There goes another keyboard!!
Posted by: Lady P at March 24, 2008 3:40 AM
You raise some interesting points. I think grants need to be secured and further research conducted, posthaste.
Posted by: Greg! at March 24, 2008 10:52 AM
my bike shorts are probably tighter than even your $100 prostitutes
That is definitely the Quote of the Day.
So is Greg's comment.
You all keep me entertained!!!
Posted by: Ginger at March 24, 2008 3:38 PM