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October 31, 2007
The Trip Out West Part XXVIII: I Show Off My Roman Numerology
If you are just coming in to the story, and you want to read all the good stuff about my stint in jail, you should really start at The Beginning.
Tom and I were in the San Francisco area for a week or maybe a bit more. His sister showed us around some and there were times we did some running around on our own.
We went into San Francisco proper at least once by ourselves. The cable cars weren't running so we took the bus to get around.
One of the places we wanted to see was Chinatown but we weren't sure how to get there. Tom said, as he pointed to the Asian fellow next to me, "Ask him." So I did and, just as you'd expect if you've ever seen a sitcom in which something similar has happened, he didn't know where it was.
I know, I know, I know. Expecting an Asian guy to know where China Town in is somewhat similar to expecting me to know when the next KKK meeting is. But, in 1983 it made a lot of sense to two young guys from the midwest.
I've no recollection of Chinatown but I seem to recall someone on the bus telling us we should have gotten off at the "last stop," and that we got off at the next stop and walked back.
I'm pretty sure that it was during this stroll that Tom said, "See those guys over there? They're a gay couple. Those guys too."
"What makes you think they're gay?" I asked.
"Well look at them. Two guys. Walking together."
"We're two guys walking together. What do you think people are saying about us?" Before he could speak up I finished, "Wait, I know. 'How did he get such a big, beautiful blond guy?!"
Tom, I should point had brown hair. He was also not a homophobe.
Above I say I have no recollection of of Chinatown. That may not be the truth. At some point Tom and I found ourselves in a shop that sold things like porno flicks and three-foot long two-headed dildos. That shop may have been in Chinatown.
(Is it dildos or dildoes? I did some Googling and the place that sells the high quality version spells it dildos. The place that sells butt plugs along with the item spells it dildoes.)
I can't leave you with that, so let's have one more bus story.
The bus was packed and Tom and I were seated. Some more people got on, one of whom was an elderly lady. I told Tom I was going to give the lady my seat and stood up to get her attention. Just after I stood some young guy took my place; Tom pointed out the error of his ways and the older gal ended up with a seat. As she was arranging her bags at her feet I couldn't help but notice she had a three-foot long kielbasa I suspect she was taking home for dinner.
Posted by delmer at October 31, 2007 7:14 PM
Comments
Did she have a nice pair of parogies too?
Posted by: Darrell at October 31, 2007 9:03 PM
Not that I noticed. (BTW, you are certainly the thinking-man's commenter.)
Posted by: delmer at October 31, 2007 9:30 PM
Delmer, Delmer, Delmer ... dildo's and kielbasa, I'll be back to see how do you segue into the next chapter. LOL
Posted by: Nancy at October 31, 2007 11:06 PM
Well... hahahah.. I tried to help you out by searching for 'free dictionary dildo plural'... look at what I found first:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dildi
I about busted a rib laughing!
Posted by: Sue at November 1, 2007 7:19 AM
But is that Dildi with and "e" or "i" sound?
I gotta know!
Posted by: mikeo at November 1, 2007 8:05 PM
Nancy: Please don't expect too much. I'm afraid the pressure might lead to writing-performance anxiety.
Sue: Nice find. That's one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. (And thanks for the help.)
If only it were "potati," Quayle could have been saved all that embarrassment.
MikeO: I don't know, but I'm voting for a long 'i' sound. Though I'll bet the sound it causes is more of a long "e" (without the "dild" in front of it).
Posted by: delmer at November 2, 2007 12:15 AM