What's a Delmer Look Like?

Lose 40 more pounds.
Not really. I just know my mom reads this and when she sees that it will make her gasp. She's probably calling me right now. See how that goal isn't even numbered, I threw it in there just before I posted this.

1. Come up with a catchier name for the list rather than just GOALS. I'm thinking Short-Terms List of Goals (SLOG) or List of Goals: Short-term (LOGS). Or Carol. You know, if you slap an "A" in LOGS or SLOG you have all the letters you need to make GOALS. What do they call that when an acronym contains itself? One of the Linux video CODECS (I think) is such an acronym. This would have to be something like Goals Originally Analyzed by the Loving Spoonful to be a fair (if somewhat stupid in this case) example.

(GNU: GNU's Not UNIX and WINE: Wine's Is Not an Emulator. Neither are video codecs.)

2. Eat at McDonald's every day until I meet goal 4.
I've been there every day in June already so I thought I'd continue the trend. I'll be in Williamsburg this weekend, but think I'll still be able to find a Micky D's somewhere. There was a big rant-type bit of text here that I've moved to the extended entry. It was sort of off-point.

3. Take active steps to lose the love handles. Maybe just make them smaller (let's be realistic). I'm tired of them being there and just thinking, "I wish these were gone," doesn't seem to be working.

4. Drop my body fat by 5% from where it currently is.
This 5% will be measured using the Tanita scale I have. I know it isn't as accurate as getting submerged in a big tub of Jell-O, or whatever it is they use, but it's what I have and it's good enough for the list. Quick math suggests this will be a loss of 10 pounds of fat; calculator-math suggests this will be 11.5 pounds of fat. (Yes, I know, there's more to it than this.)

5. Do the Sprint 8 stuff.
Three days a week regardless of other activity. For at least 8 weeks at which point I'll reassess the usefulness to see what I'm getting out of it. I stuck with this for a while last year and then stopped it when I started going on long bike rides.

6. Swim 5 more than one full laps without stopping.
By the time the pool closes on Labor Day. Hopefully I'll develop some form. You know, five sounds like a low number, but it may still be too big (thus the change).

7. Cycle in a more organized manner.
That is do something, at least once a week, that I can measure. Maybe timing the 15-mile loop I take and trying to get faster. I'm also going to make better use of my heart-rate monitor. If I'm going to be on the bike for extended periods of time I may as well get all I can out of it. Right now I just go out and pedal 15 to 50 miles and while I'm not unhappy with my speed, sometimes I just feel like I'm going through the motions. I've no desire to average 25 mph for 50 miles as I think that would hurt some and take the fun out of it. Hurting for a short period of time once a week may not be a bad thing. (When I was younger I used to play a lot of basketball and there's something about wearing yourself out that just feels good. I don't get a lot of that anymore.)

Speaking of things I don't get a lot of anymore …

8. Have sex on my birthday.
Writing about The Trip Out West reminded me of just how much fun that was. I'm going to try not to go to sleep too soon this time. (If you must send me birthday wishes, please do so by mail. I will not be answering the phone that day. It would be rude.)

My extended rant regarding eating at McDonald's every day for a while.

I was put off years ago when Caesar Barber decided to sue McDonald's for making him fat. And I was further irritated by Morgan Spurlock's Super Size Me, wherein the character eats at McDonald's on a regular basis and each time he's asked if he wants to Super Size it, he says "yes" and he gets fat. I'm not necessarily trying to make a point, this just seems like an easy goal to meet. Well, and I do have a problem with people who don't take responsibility for their own actions; if I ate everything my mother offered me I'd be big as a house — and she kicks out food that is a lot better than anything you'll find in a restaurant.

I blame Morgan Spurlock for the short-term unavailability of Super Sized Diet Cokes at McDonald's. Some might argue that Spurlock's actions, and the I'm Fat and Suing You lawsuits were responsible for healthier choices at fast food places, and they may be to an extent, but McDonald's has had salads for years (they had a really nice one years ago that was replaced by the stupid idea of a salad-in-a-shaker and now good ones are back) And, way back in the 80's there was some sort of chain that offered healthier fast-food fare; it didn't last very long … people would rather eat greasy Rally's cheeseburgers and White Castle burgers. Don't blame the restaurants for giving people what they want.

And as for the argument that McDonald's was causing people to crave bad food choices. That's crap. For the next several days eat grilled chicken salads for lunch and dinner. It won't take long before you start to think, a grilled chicken salad sounds like a good idea. Be sure to skip the dressing.

Anyway, I eat a lot of grilled chicken salads (no dressing) and I find that when I'm hungry for something it is often a grilled chicken salad. Your mileage may vary. (And, of course, there are time when I think that nothing would taste better than a big old greasy hamburger or a teeny-tiny Slider.)

Posted by delmer at June 14, 2007 4:46 PM

Comments

Which is why I loathe Subway's asinine "Jarod Fogel" commercials. The idiot compares a Subway sandwich with NO mayo and NO cheese to the biggest, fattiest, unhealthiest selections on fast food menus from McDonalds and Burger King... surprise, surprise, Subway is a healthier place to eat! What a load of crap.

Posted by: Dave2 at June 14, 2007 7:53 PM

Jarod was in town a couple of months ago speaking at one of the local schools. I didn't mention it earlier as I didn't want his association with Hilliard to put you off Pasta Salvi.

Posted by: delmer at June 14, 2007 9:09 PM

Delmer, Delmer, Delmer--all the readers (my friends) know why I am so white headed. Plus the three boys are here--I can't even get hair dye to stick.
In regard to item 8--your birthday is on a Thursday--so I'll see you on the previous Saturday or the next Saturday. White cake/white icing and vanilla ice cream. I doubt I throw a chunk of chicken from the freezer directly on the grill.
The Wells reunion is on the 4th--lets all go.

Posted by: Mom at June 15, 2007 7:44 AM

I like the SLOG idea, it's a good aspiration.

I just wonder if your priorities are right. Maybe number eight should be higher depending on when your birthday is.

Posted by: Michael at June 16, 2007 11:46 AM

Michael: You make a good point. Right now I've got them ordered in a manner in which they are more likely to happen. That is, items that have a better chance of meeting success are at the top; maybe I should have ordered them by importance.

Posted by: delmer at June 19, 2007 10:29 AM