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September 17, 2006
I made a mistake this weekend
I was at soccer practice Friday night, sort of sitting there minding my own business. I stood up to talk to one of the moms and she asked, "Where's your other half."
And for just a moment I thought she meant the woman who used to be married to me. Then I realized she meant the other half of me. If anybody cares I'm down 145 pounds -- or close enough I'm claiming it. This morning I came in at 226 pounds (and I had ice cream every day last week and pizza several days.)
A while back I finished reading They Don't Play Hockey in Heaven, by Ken Baker. Mr. Baker has a pituitary tumor. In this book he mentions it and refers to it as a brain tumor several times.
Brain tumor? That certainly sounds sinister.
So I looked it up.
I'm certain I knew this at one time. It only makes sense. The pituitary gland is right behind the eyes ...mostly. In the brain area. So it is a brain tumor. I believe they're, as a class, called Pituitary Adenomas.
I have a habit of making light of my pituitary problem. I get this from my mother. When I was younger she had a couple of surgeries that I know, now that I'm older, could have had serious repercussions, but at the time were presented to the kids (I was in my twenties) as pretty much a walk in the park.
The type of pituitary tumor I have can create some life-screwing-up problems. It certainly messed up the quality of my life for several years. The medicine used to treat the tumor has side effects that are traumatic for some; luckily I don't have any of those. (I guess the tumor could have been responsible for killing me. Men with low testosterone are more likely to suffer from heart disease and have heart attacks. They are more likely to develop diabetes. Low T can cause loss of muscle mass, loss of bone mass, loss of libido, and men are men are more likely to suffer from depression, an increase in body fat and mood swings (meaning others will want to kill you). The upside is that men with low testosterone are more likely to stop and ask for directions when lost.)
So. If you have a pituitary tumor, happen across my site, and think that I think it was a hair worse than a caffeine headache, it wasn't, and I don't want to belittle anything you are going through. There were times I was close to tears -- which I assume had something to do with my hormones straightening out. And if watery eyes count as being in tears, then I was. I'm not really much of a sobber.
I also know weight loss is a real bitch for some. I tried for years to drop weight and had no to limited success. Until I started getting treated for the tumor.
Nobody sees the tumor. Everybody sees the weight loss. And as soon as they figure out who the thin guy with Delmer's kids are they wonder what I did to lose the weight, was it hard to lose the weight, etc.
People have told me they see me riding my bike and running and figure that's the key.
(I don' run. Sometimes I walk briskly. But not that briskly. I don't know who they're seeing.)
Another thing the people didn't see was the year I spent walking, riding the stationary recumbent bike, lifting, and counting calories and getting absolutely nowhere.
Nothing clicked until I started taking Dostinex. (FWIW, until recently I thought the increase in testosterone was the key to the weight dropping off. I've recently read some postings by women who developed high-prolactin issues that believe it -- the prolactin -- is responsible for their sudden weight gain.) And then the weight started falling.
And even when weight wasn't steadily dropping off, I continued to drop clothing sizes. Which, I'm pretty sure was the increase in testosterone leading to greater muscle mass. Yada yada yada ... a Floyd Landis crack goes here ... but what do I know, I'm just a sample of one.
Anyway, any explanation I give about the weight loss usually leads to, "Well, whatever you're doing, keep it up."
Of course I'm going to keep it up. If I don't my life will go back to sucking horribly.
But really, there are worse things. I (now) take two pills twice a week. A buddy of mine takes blood pressure meds daily. I don't have any issue with the meds. Some people are not as lucky as I have been.
At this point in my life the tumor is a non-issue for me. Unless I get hit by a bus or something I will likely live into my 90's. Most of the men in my family live to be pretty old.
Where were we? Ah, the mistake.
Someone asked where my other half was. Meaning the other half of me.
I said, "You really don't want to know. It will only make you sad." I said it in a joking tone.
She said, "How do you mean."
I said, "I have a brain tumor."
"Delmer, you're so full of shit."
"I'm not kidding I said," even though I'd already passed the point at which I'd regretted saying it at all. Even though I'd said it in a light-hearted manner.
Then I explained fully. Then I apologized for it.
And I've felt bad about it all weekend.
Posted by delmer at September 17, 2006 8:35 PM
Comments
Hey--missed you all. Don't feel bad you may be of some help to that person. Only those people that have had the experience of being there thoughout your life know your stories are for real and that you are one of the most honest people alive. As for being full of #@&%! have your seen that comercial for the colon cleanser--------John Wayne 40 lbs..........Love you
Posted by: Granny at September 18, 2006 7:25 AM